I've always agreed with David Byrne's quote about lyrics: they're a trick to get you to listen to a song longer than you normally would. Most song lyrics are reprehensible to me, some are vaguely unnoticeable, and only a tiny fraction of them are brilliant. I realize I'm in the minority on this one, as most people find a great deal of meaning in their favorite songs, but to me, lyrics fall under the following categories:
- badly-forced rhyme (most boy bands, No Doubt, Britney, Pink, etc.)
- incomprehensible and pretentious (Alanis Morrissette, some Fiona Apple, etc.)
- nihilistic bullshit (Bush, Creed, Matchbox 20, and all college moaning rock)
- lame aphorisms ending up as high school yearbook quotes (Dave Matthews, Jimmy Buffett, the Dead, Phish, Widespread, etc.)
I mean, give me the indiscernible vocals of the Cocteau Twins, the Sea & Cake, Stereolab and early R.E.M. any day of the week - at least those guys understood that vocals were meant to be another instrument, not a bullhorn for whatever dime-store epiphany the lead singer happened to have during fellatio the night before. I loathe country music, but at least they understand the ludicrousness of their lyrics; someone in Murfreesboro, Tennessee thinks "Drop-Kick Me Jesus, Through the Goalposts of Life" and then writes a song around it. There's only three or four rap bands I can stand (Outkast, Wu-Tang, Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul – you know, the ones for white dudes), but I appreciate the genre because the lyrics aren't a trick, they're the thing. When that Matchbox 20 poster boy gets a song from his guitarist, he begins the process with nothing to say and it goes from there.
Of course, I'm a total hypocrite. My favorite lyricists in the world are probably Morrissey and John Lennon, both famous for nihilism and pretention. When I told our music supervisor that I didn't like lyrics, she basically thought I was a moron who didn't try hard enough - so I tried to think about the lyrics that have always affected me, and listed them in my head. And now that I have, they're all so strange, and probably meaningless to anyone else. You can't help what you like, you know.
My Fave Lyrics
We got through the 30s though our belts were tight
Conceived of a future with no hope in sight
We've got decades ahead of us to get it right, I swear
Fifty years after the fair.
- Aimee Mann, "Fifty Years After the Fair"
Boy afraid
Prudence never pays
And everything she wants costs money
"But she doesn't even LIKE me!
And I know because she said so.
In the room downstairs
She sat and stared.
I'll never make that mistake again!"
- the Smiths, "Girl Afraid"
The third time I saw lightning strike
It struck me in bed
It threw me around
And left me for dead.
- The Cure, "Hot Hot Hot!"
Everybody says join our religion, and get to Heaven
I say no thanks why bless my soul
I'm already there!
- XTC, "Season Cycle"
Any major dude with half a heart surely would tell you, my friend
Any minor world that breaks apart falls together again
If the demon is at your door,
In the morning it won't be there no more.
- Steely Dan, "Any Major Dude"
It's a sad but natural fact
That something deep inside stays lonely forever.
- General Public, "Cry on Your Own Shoulder"
She's not a girl who misses much.
She's well acquainted with the touch of a velvet hand
Like a lizard on a windowpane
The man in the crowd with the multicolored mirrors
On his hobnail boots.
Lying with his eyes while his hands are busy working overtime
A soap impression of his wife which he ate
And donated to the National Trust.
- The Beatles, "Happiness is a Warm Gun"
Everybody knows you only live a day
But it's brilliant anyway.
- Elliot Smith, "Independence Day"
I know I'm unlovable
You don't have to tell me.
Message received, loud and clear.
- The Smiths, "Unlovable"
Hey fat girl, c'mere - are you ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya fat.
Look at me, I'm skinny.
- Digital Underground, "The Humpty Dance"