xtcian

get me to the drive-thru on time

4/4/04

We were on a top-secret covert mission to Las Vegas today, an operation so clandestine that Tessa and I barely knew about it. In short, our lovely and wonderful friends Laurie Williams and George Gilmore decided to eschew big celebrations, cast off the shackles of their pasts, and get married in Vegas.

But they weren't just going to get married, they were going to do it at a Wedding Drive-Thru, the kind of place you've always heard about, but never dared experience. Well, let us tell you: such places exist, we drove there, and God bless 'em, they did it.

Laurie looked stunning in a gossamer green outfit, and George was strapping in a matching mint-flavored suit of his own. A scant 5-minute drive from the eloquent Venetian casino lies the "Say I Do" Wedding Drive Thru, a modest cinder-block structure with much the same workings as an old-fashioned A&W restaurant.

Nobody came to the window when we drove up, so both Tessa and I went inside to investigate: in short, it seemed like a day-care center in Chihuahua. At least three Hispanic weddings were in various states of progress, and swarms of kids, all suckling on grape Chilly Willies that stained everything around them, climbed over all the furniture.

Finally, the minister – who must have the patience of several Benedictine saints – came out to the window and began the scant bits of paperwork. Tessa signed as a witness, and as the minister quoted the gospel Matthew, the entire proceedings suddenly took on a formal, sacred, otherworldly aura that could have been just as meaningful up on the hill at our own wedding. As Laurie and George exchanged vows, it felt like such a relief, a simple, beautiful moment free of the pitfalls of judgment, crowds, prior history, and caterers. At 4:44pm EST, on 04/04/04, they were happily married.

Afterwards, we parked the car in the sun, and basked in a perfect sunny day in the desert. The cell phones came out, and they informed an incredulous world of friends of what they'd just done. Each call was hilarious in its own way, worth catching even one side of the conversation.

Here's to Laurie and George: two souls who really deserve each other by now. Long may they rock, on stage, in film, at breakfast, on voyages, at rest, and always with each other.