7/27/04
Everyone has a few guardian angels that helped them out when they were young and insane, and I had two sets: the parents of Marcie and the parents of Hampy. Both Hamp and Marcie were among my closest confidantes at high school, especially while I weathered the horrors of puberty, and the dark rumblings of my own family, which was beginning to break apart.
Hamp's parents were especially kind to me – I stayed in their house countless times, ate hundreds of meals, sleeping in the room with the big double bass, playing with their dog Dusty, and basically doing everything I could to get out of my own home. By the time I got my first (borrowed) car – a brown 1981 Chevy Citation with an interior coated with 2mm of root beer – I was over at their house as often as they'd let me.
Hampy's mom gave me little cards for my birthday, got me a present for graduation, and even put a tiny ceramic sign over the guest bedroom that said "Ian's Room." As we all went to college, however, my visits back to Norfolk, VA became very infrequent – I began to equate the place with the dissolution of my parents' marriage and my own utterly embarrassing lack of self-awareness.
I wish I'd stayed in better contact with Hamp's family, because I never got to tell his mother how wonderful she'd been to me, and how much I adored their sanctuary. She passed away this week, and my heart goes out to their wonderful family.
She was so full of grace, from the old Southern school of gentle charm. And so I take this opportunity now, in the quiet hush of the digital ether, to tell her thank you, and to tell Hamp that he was raised by a truly fantastic lady.
Posted by irw at July 27, 2004 11:16 PMI only met Hampy's mom a couple of times, and had a couple of extended conversations with her. I remember seeing the door with the "Ian's Room" sign. It was during a time when my life had been twisted into some unrecognizable cartoon of what I had been trying to achieve for my family. Impossible. But those days, you had friends, Ian, who were amazing, with parents who were so kind, so generous, and who picked up so much of the slack that I will always be grateful.
I remember Hampy's Mom really well, and she had of the sort of gentle sweetness and good humor that I saw in so many of the southern women I knew in Virginia.
I'm sorry to hear of her passing, and happy that you wrote this excellent and loving tribute to her.
Whoa - just randomly checking in here, and I didn't expect to get this news. I'm so saddened to hear about this loss. She was a wonderful and kind lady who was always happy to have us invade her house. Ian, thanks for writing about her. Hamp, if you're reading this, my heart goes out to you and your family. I'll be in touch more directly. God bless you, Mrs. T!