July 28, 2004
bloomin' onion
7/28/04
I find it quite wonderful that all the stürm und drang of the Democratic convention, all the pundits rhapsodizing on Teresa Heinz Kerry's accent, the speculation of Obama's ascendancy to the White House, the micro-polls being conducted by the digiterati... it all comes down to a couple thousand undecided voters in Ohio and Florida.
Really, the fate of the free world hangs in the whims of a few vacillating Circuit City employees who hang out at the Bennigan's near Toledo, a few women with bad hair shopping at the T.J Maxx in Sarasota. I wonder what kind of pressure they feel as one of the few undecided voters in a swing state – do they relish their undecidedness as an emblem of courage, or do they just see-saw from side to side as their friends try to drag them in opposing ideological directions?
Like it or not, this is that rare time when very smart, connected people from cultured places like New York and Washington D.C. have to actually understand the thought processes of your average mediocre American. There are a ton of us who keep blogs, and there are incessant poll-watchers, and wonkish political junkies, but I dare say they have ZERO amount of commiseration with these very ordinary Americans.
I like to think that I understand them, having grown up in rural and boring suburban environments, having cut my teeth in some of the most depressing malls in America, and having birthday parties at Shakey's Pizza in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. But a quick trip to Jasper, Georgia proved to me how removed from this world I'd become. Salem took me to a honky-tonk, and I felt like I was on Neptune.
It must be awesome to see these political think-tank operatives try to guess the next move of the undecided Ohio voter, a guy who who just changed the oil in his bitchin' Camaro en route to Happy Hour at TGIF. The only thing us Democrats have going for us – besides being on the side of goodness and light – is that the Republican leadership has as little insight into the Average American as we do.
I wonder if any of those undecided voters in Ohio and Fla were watching Edward's speech last night and I also wondered how they might react to it had they watched. If you are a lower income type, i just do not understand how you could vote for 'W'. And BTW.. don't those 'W' bumper stickers just annoy you? It's like he's trying to become like Prince or Sting or something..just with fewer letters. (and that ain't the only fewer!!)
Love that song Bitchin' Camaro....'ran over an old lady at the county fair..it don't matter my old man's the mayor Bitcin'Camaro.'
Remember when George H. W. Bush was so impressed with the "new-fangled scanners" at the check-out line at the grocery store, as if he had never purchased his own groceries, which of course he had probably never done? I remember thinking at that time, "my God, this man has no concept of the reality of the average American!"
By the way, I doubt that Teresa Heinz Kerry has been to the local Shop Rite or can tell you the cost of a gallon of milk, either. The cost of a bottle of Heinz ketchup maybe, but not much else!I think the disparity between the politicians and the rest of us is so vast. . . it goes way beyond cosmopolitan vs. rural. Kind of frightening, huh?
The "undecided" voter is not yet even thinking about the election. Although hopefully they will sometime after the debates. It just doesn't matter to them.
And Kevin, I find it works OK to shorten "Dubya" to simply "Duh".
Damn. I miss my old Applebee's. That's all people in Ohio are thinking about - fried appetizers and milkshakes.
I spend 30 hours a week talking to these people, and its sometimes totally overwhelming and depressing. I go to people's doors who tell me they really do think that they will vote for Kelly, and others who speak in 10 minute long sentances that break into 40 year histories of who they have voted for since Johnson.
It is totally weird that these are the people that are deciding this election, but I take comfort in the fact that there are people out there who make sure that every "kelly" voter in the country will cast a vote, hopefully at home via absentee ballot so that come November 2 they don't decide that mozerella sticks are more interesting than getting out to the polls.
As someone who would have exploded if Al Gore became President, I don't think this is going to be as close as the media suggest. Al Gore is a weenie and he won the popular vote! Any thinking man or woman that represented the "swing" vote in 90 for Bush, WILL vote for Kerry in 94.
In my itty bitty town of 2,000 I have seen China snuff the stained glass industry. Our "Evenflow" manufacturing plant (your babies are all drinking from Evenflow sippy cups no matter what the label and a few of your children were killed by their re-called cradles) well, they moved to Mexico. I grew my sales by 15%, but dramatic increases in food costs cut my profit in half, even after I raised prices by 12%. Two sewing plants moved to Mexico, my natural gas doubled, my comprehensive medical plan tripled so I pay cash for medicine and have major medical only. Our builders pay double for wood and concrete. Our electricians pay double for conduit.
Kerry will sweep Florida. Granny is on a fixed income, she's paying more for her drugs and she is not paying 10 fucking dollars for the earlybird special! She is not benefiting from the export sales of wood and concrete to China and Iraq. She's just pissed she can't afford to have her deck fixed anymore because these materials cost Americans more than ever.