January 3, 2006
banned from green gables
1/3/06
Back in 2003, Tessa and I attended the Zap Your PRAM conference up in Prince Edward Island - a wonderful get-together of technophiles and folks in the know who agreed to come to this tiny town on a tiny island during a slightly miserable time of year. Of course, it was fantastic.
We screened an early cut of the "Pink House" movie, engaged in hot discussions over the future of this here internet with some famous netizens, and basically chilled out while the distant October sun wafted across the shores of the northern Maritimes. They even had a basketball hoop.
One of the conference leaders was our friend Dan, whose parents owned a large bed & breakfast in Cavendish, so he installed satellite internet, gave us each our own bedroom, and during the day we'd hunker down in the conference room like an extended slumber party. Old timers to this blog may remember the trip home as the time when I got detained by Homeland Security and had to write an essay to free myself.
I mention this because we were seriously considering going back up to P.E.I. for Zap Your PRAM 3 (which is named a little like The Thompson Twins or Ben Folds Five) because it has become one of our favorite places in the world, and you get to take this humongous catamaran to get there. Also, Peter himself - along with Dan, Daniel, Steven and any other Islander you meet - are fabulous, fabulous company.
Then we got an email today saying that this year's conference was called off, due to a "lack of fire" in their bellies. The first conference had come together so organically, and this one was proving a struggle. Besides, they didn't know exactly what they would talk about.
This was a fascinating thing to do, in my opinion. Tessa called it very Taoist. I'm so used to forcing things to happen, like the Jartaculars or other random events, that I would never contemplate calling anything off. The fire in my belly is self-generating and seemingly inextinguishable, and I'm always afraid that if I don't make something happen, suddenly "not making something happen" would be okay, and then nothing would ever happen again.
As for not having things to talk about, I always assume that if you get more than two interesting people into a room, that sort of shit takes care of itself. When we have guests at the farm, the place turns into a lefty think-tank (or in the case of my family, a fartgasm of fart jokes), and all it takes is an outsider to get things going.
Yet still, the decision to pull the plug on something they love is a decision by the P.E.I. folk I have to admire. It's Buddhist in its calm understanding of human currents, and brave in its faith that another gathering could still happen one day. Maybe all the commenters here could meet on Prince Edward Island and get seafood.
I should have been so circumspect about things in my own life. I've forced the issue so many times, and occasionally it has come to near disaster. I have seen the writing on the wall telling me to go home and pick my battles, and decided to tell the wall to fuck itself. I have plowed on with losing hands, going further under.
It's hard not to mistake perseverance for self-destructive bluster. I have something to learn from these wise islanders.
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the beautiful, dark beach - late autumn 2003, Cavendish, PEI
I think I've noticed and admired the same ease in Peter and so I must concur, but on learning of the cancelation I also felt a bittersweetness, perhaps as upon beholding the falling of the cherry blossems. So I think there's some Shinto on the follow through after the Tao and the Buddhism. Small wheel, though, definitely not big wheel.
I think you are missing the point. They just realized they didn't have enough snow blowers. We used to have 12 foot drifts in my front lawn there. And even if they did have enough all we would have ended up doing was snow blowing, snow blowing, snow blowing. "Who's that in the blue parka" I would have shouted to Dan as we took a break from snow blowing. "Tessa, I think," he would reply, "sweet snow blower, eh."
Ian, great thoughts on perseverance vs. forcing things. I'm constantly having to stop and ask myself, "Do I really want or need to be doing this?" Sometimes I'm gratified by pushing through the resistance and finding something worthwhile on the other side, but other times I wind up wondering why the hell I put myself through that. I guess the real trick is, after having made the decision in either direction, to be at peace with it.
I'm up for the seafood in P.E.I.!
Hi Ian,
We haven't met, but now I learn that we could have met at this year's Zap. So missing that opportunity does suck, but the lack of belly fire also sucks, so they (the boys) definitely made the right call.
Your family could always just come here for no reason, now that would be Taoist.
Maybe this needs to be even more free form by taking on an unadministered roving format. Pick a Motel 6 or Holiday Inn somewhere out there near a Dairy Queen. Montreal 2006. Barcelona 2007. Beirut 2008. Whoever gets there gets there.
How good is the seafood? Will there be PEI mussels?
I've never felt so noble about laziness and apathy. My heart is warmed.
I'm kinda bummed though - you'll have to come visit us anyhow.
I read the "Customs" post, and I really did laugh through most of it. It's like an episode of "24", but instead of Jack Bauer blowing something up to save the day, he has to write a book report on Moby Dick . . . or something like that. That story would make a grat "Curb Your Enthusiasm" episode.
totally. figuring out how to NOT do shit you love, but without feeling like life or something else just DEFEATED you and prevented it from happening...
happy new year, ian and friends! i love returning to a post like this. such valuable fodder for thought when new year's resolutions still hang about in the air...
the struggle between forcing, encouraging, heeding what your body tells you vs. no-pain-no-gain society, will go on forever, i fear. but i'm hopeful that, as we get older, we gain insights like yours, and we're able to respect the rythms and ebbs and flows without losing hope that things might be different one day.
i hope 2006 allows for more insightful and provocative discussions. as my card this year announced in green: "happy hope" to all of you!
and on a somewhat unrelated note - i just want to say this is a really good blog, and even way better even than the wednesday's child stuff from back in the day. i actually don't read any blogs at all except once in a great while i'll read my bandmate's blog: http://www.hipmama.com/node/17341 but mostly they give me the feeling like i am either reading someone else's diary or joining a cult. but this blog is definitely rockin it right. ian the blog dj -big up!
Great reading, keep up the great posts.
Peace, JiggaDigga