March 05, 2006
weight room!
3/5/06
Really, even I have to admit that in its most distilled form, my religion is only ten guys trying to get a piece of spherical leather into a basket. But for those of you who don't love college basketball the way I do, I really hope you have some other irrational interest that gives your life constant metaphors, mythic anticipation, and an opportunity to cry both flavors.
I'm not going to get into what happened with UNC vs. dook on Saturday night, because if you care, you've already read 15-20 breathless articles in print and the internet, and if you don't, no amount of gliding verbiage will make you see these things differently.
Suffice to say my team - the one from Chapel Hill wearing light blue - went to Durham on their "senior night" and, against many odds too numerous to repeat, won. For me, the joy wasn't entirely the final score. It was the laying bare of something we've known for decades.
It was comeuppance for a gifted shooter who nonetheless gave the UNC crowd the "shocker" (a violently anal, sexist hand gesture) after knocking down the game-winners in the first contest. It was Koach K spewing such guttersnipe profanity at one ref that he had to be restrained. It was an entire channel of ESPN showing the "Cameron Crazies" - who once chanted "orphan!" at our own Scott Williams, whose parents had killed each other - struck dumb at the sight of their team disintegrating. It was a Duke player, Sean Dockery, deliberately striking our player Tyler Hansbrough in the mouth after the game was already over.
These things were seen, seen by anyone who happened to glance at any of the ESPN channels last night, and certainly discussed by fans of all schools, regardless of affiliation. The book was laid open, and the pages flew everywhere.
I like to think I was on the front lines of hating Duke, not just because of the DTH article from 1990, but because my adolescence coincided roughly with the ascendance of Koach K in the ACC, meaning I came of age right around the same year his teams did. As I have oft said, I camped out in the mud that was to become Carmichael Dorm during the holiday months of 1985 to see the first game in the Dean Dome.
I have now attended twenty-one straight home UNC-dook games since that evening, and loathed everything they stood for. In the last few weeks, I - along with many other fans of the game - have been joined by pundits from respected TV sports organizations, internet personalities, and about-to-be-bestselling authors in wondering aloud why such an obvious jerk like K, coaching at such a freakishly lame school like dook, has been getting such a pass all these years.
Indeed, the complaints - dook gets all the calls, K is a filthy-mouthed asswipe who rides officials, their players are sore winners and even sorer losers, K's ads for American Express redefine hypocrisy, K throws his players under the bus for the sake of winning at all costs, dook students ruin Durham's neighborhoods, etc. - have risen to such a fever pitch that I'm now anticipating the backlash backlash.
But for now, I feel like all of us who have grinned and beared it for so long are finally given succor. Again, if you don't follow this sport, it may all seem pathetic, picayune and unimportant. In a way, I feel sorry for you, because the unmasking of a villain is always such joy, but only if you're deeply in love with the story.
Dookies know that Saturday night was a watershed event. UNC took their best under the best of dookie circumstances: 2 All-Americans, senior night, JJ receiving 3 points for shots when his toes is on the line, their senior point guard punching our freshman phenom in the face, Coach K's tirade at the officials OVER A LANE VIOLATION, their other senior (Melchionni) making a jumper and having the temerity to bark at our bench as he ran down the floor.
Yes, the dookies did all these things and none of our players ever retaliated or lost their composure. I have prowled the dookie websites all weekend (I feel so dirty) and have not found a single dookie pointing any fingers at us regarding dirty play, taunting, etc. They know.
Coach K has again refused to develop a bench. Speaking of which, he also refused to play some of his seniors on Senior Night -- an insult that NEVER happens at UNC! It bit him in the butt on Saturday. And, guess what, the cavalry is really coming next year. UNC fans know it and dookies know it. Roy has signed a recruiting class called by one expert "one of the top 2 or 3 classes in the history of college basketball."
Yes, dookies, it is over. Even if you somehow pull a rabbit out of your butts and win the ACC Tournament, you'll still know that Saturday night was not an aberration. You'll know that we are on the meteoric rise and you are on cruise control.
Great post, Ian. I've been looking forward to reading this since Saturday night.
I watched the game and was enriched by the context I had gained through years now of reading these posts. Sweet drama throughout. Sadly, Syracuse has slumped and so my local team never gave me the same experience, losing to Villanova yesterday in a gutsy effort against a simply superior team.
I gotta be honest. I am a Duke fan. That being said, Hanesbrough getting smacked in the mouth (more or less) was a truly despicable act. Congrats to the 'heels, it was a good win for you guys. If your boy doesn't get "Coach of the Year", then I may start to agree that the press has a hard-on for Caoch K and the Blue Devils.
Thank you, Kevin. There may be hope for you yet. In the words of Luke Sywalker, "there is good in [you], I can feel it." Now, Kevin, leave the dark side of the Democratic Party and dook and allow your soul to be saved.
Saturday was an intense night at the Steakhouse. Logging on to find Hansbrough's smiling face on google sports was better than finding a fifty in my pocket after a visit to Grandmother Suber's house. What a treat. You know I'm not a huge fan of any sport, but these moments....sweet. I just wish more sports writers had given Reddick more opportunities to express how he crumbled in his own words.
I have never been much of a sports fan, but Iowa Basketball is as close as I've gotten. I was an undergrad when Ronnie Lester took the Hawkeyes to the final four, carrying his boombox that only played "Rapper's Delight." I split season tickets with a neighbor for two seasons during Tom Davis' career. Davis was a strange sort of success: Iowa always did OK in the Big 10 only to fall apart in the first few rounds of the NCAA tournament. We were always contenders who did well enough to be respected, but not so well that they upstaged the teams perennially in the sweet 16. When he left -- to coach Drake University in Des Moines -- it was suprising that he had won more games than any other Iowa coach.
Davis had a notoriously poor end game -- the worst place for Iowa to be with Davis was 3 points up with two minutes to go. What he did do, though, was set a record for the number of players graduated. The walk-on Waymond King was a dependable, but unspectacular player who graduated with a year of eligibility so he played his last year as a graduate student, and left Iowa with a master's degree.
While Davis was coach his players stayed off the police blotter. Not so with Steve Alford, who can't seem to simmer down trouble players. Iowa went nowhere a few years ago with two of the most talented players in college basketball, because he never found a way to keep their heads into the game.
For a UNC fan, you know the pure elation of watching your team win a championship. In Iowa what passes for a transcendant moment is beating Bobby Knight's Indiana team in January, and watch him make an ass of himself after the game. For the moment Iowa was better than one of the top teams in the country, and we did it being sportsmanlike, dignified and friendly. We may never be excellent, but we can be decent, and avoid the sort of excellence that is tarnished with boorishness.
It was indeed a great day to be a Heel yesterday. What dean said above is true - this was a watershed event. No WAY were the Heels supposed to beat dook this year. No way. And yet Roy found a way to be the better team.
I am beginning to think for the first time this year that there is a chance that we could actually defend our crown. At this point, anything is possible.
i must say, i'd been looking forward to this post all weekend too; what a sweet, sweet victory. i watched the whole game with this stupid, stunned grin on my face...
As a Big 12/Big 10 guy, I normally couldn't care less about Duke-UNC, but I watched the game Saturday night knowing that Ian (and most of his readers) had an emotional stake in it. Actually, my boss is a UNC grad too. Congrats to all of you.
Kent, the Hawks will surprise this year. I just know it!
I knew as I was clicking on the link for your blog that the picture of Psycho T and Noel would be in today's entry.
Despite the comeuppance for Dook, one of its most voluble defenders was still at work late in the game -- yes, that was Dick Vitale, trying to make the case for Dook being an "overachieving" team this season. Umm, OK. The team with two All Americans and four scholarship seniors who play regularly overachieved. Rrrriiiggghhhtt.
Oh, the joy of Vitale hyperbole -- the (Blue) Devil worship that turns a routine hustle play by Melchionni (too lazy to check the spelling) into the most incredible act of hoops heroics ever.
Why am I focusing on that bullshit? My real reaction was a victory dance around the living room rug to show my six-year-old how you celebrate good triumphing over evil. (Which made me miss the Dockery slap -- was that really intentional?)
Onward, Roy and the undaunted Heels. The fact that you are too good now to be shipped to the Salt Lake City regional (where I'll be) is just fine by me.
I know this is juvenile and greedy but I wanted to see either K or JJ cry.
Well said, Ian.
Well said, Dean.
This was the first win over dook in a long while that I did not seek out my dook friends to rub it in their face.
And, for those of you who know me well, that's counter to the very fabric of my being. I harken back to CINDERELLA for this next analogy. You recall how, at the end of that fairy tale, Cinderella leaves with Prince Charming and has no ill will toward the step sisters and evil step mother, levaing them instead to just rot in their own anger and disgust?
I never understood that. I used to hate that Cinderella didn't just turn around and spend about 10 minutes dancing a jig, telling them to "SUCK IT", while rubbing it in their faces.
But now I get it.
There's no need to point out the obvious to the dook fans. They know. And they know that we know that they know. And, being the smart kids they are purported to be, that's gotta sting worse than any jig Dean and I could dance in front of their faces.
For the record, though, I'm sure Dean and I could still put together a jig which might further deflate whatever air is left in the dookies. We did it in front of Mickey K back in the day in 1992, and I doubt we've lost a step since then.
And so I didn't call a soul from dook today or yesterday or Saturday night.
Rather, I just enjoyed the figurative ride off into the sunset on the coat tails of Tyler and Roy.
Confident that I'm going to enjoy a lot more nights like Saturday in the coming years.
By the way, I love the title of today's blog. I still have not confirmed whether the title of this blog is exactly what Tyler yelled to Stackhouse after he allegedly dunked on the former Carolina star, but his play all season makes me believe it's probably more true than not.
I understand the Duke chatter, but why not a single word about the attack on Chapel Hill over the weekend by an Islamic extremist? I thought that would've elicited a comment or two.
You know - I was actually looking forward to the game Saturday night with a distinct feeling that we might actually win. And it's been a long time since I truly believed in my heart that we could beat dook. I can't express my joy and elation in watching our boys beat those m-f'ers on SENIOR NIGHT at Cameron. Sweet Justice. And that's what Karma will do for ya.
And Ian, I'll buy your Hating shirt if you'll correct the spelling of dook... ;)
Ian, Tanya makes a great point. I would have been the second in line to buy the shirt if you corrected the spelling. Any chance of that?
I guess I am way out of the loop...what are you talking about Matt?
This:
To follow up on Bill's point, I too was disgusted by Dickie V's excuse-making for Redick's failure to show up for what should have been one of the bigger games of his career. For me, the nadir of the evening's comments came when Vitale praised Redick for enduring "all of the emotional, physical and verbal abuse" during road games this year. Physical abuse? Did I miss something? Anyway, it was an evening of sweet vindication, and I hope that Coach K hasn't slept a wink since. I was reminded just what a colossal dick he is when I watched the postgame press conference after the Florida State game. He is so demeaning to writers who are just trying to do their jobs (and who generally kiss his ass anyway) that it made me want to puke. Which rhymes with...okay, I'll shut up now...
You raise a good point, Eric. I'm glad (well, even gladd*er*) that I listened to Woody on the Tar Heel Sports Network instead of that moron Vitale.
If he, and for that matter Coach K (and all of dook u) just suddenly *dematerialized* - well, I wouldn't shed a tear.
I guess it would be a much duller world without such good foci for all our negative energy.
And Matt, yes, that was a horrible thing Friday. Thank god it didn't turn out any worse. FYI, most of us here find UNC/dook a *lot* more interesting than all the political bullshit.
Kent, I must admit that I never expected to see a detailed analysis of Iowa basketball when I pulled up Ian's blog today. I am a part-time Hawkeye fan myself. I grew up in Anamosa and attended pretty much all Iowa home games from 1974 to 1981, and occasional games thereafter. I am squarely in the Tom Davis camp of the Davis v. Alford debate. Davis is an unbelievably classy guy, while Alford seems like a total a-hole. I must take issue with two statements, though. Although Davis struggled taking Iowa much further, he NEVER lost a first round game in the NCAAs. And Davis didn't leave Iowa to take the job at Drake. He was unceremoniously given a gold watch and dumped at Iowa. He took the Drake job only after spending about three years in retirement. I think we probably would agree that Ronnie Lester was the greatest Hawk of all time -- although I was also a big fan of Bruce "Sky" King.
I am now happily married to a Carolina alum, and am slowly becoming a solid UNC fan. I had the privilege of watching Saturday's game in a crowded bar on Franklin Street. It was sweet. Congrats to the Heels.
"FYI, most of us here find UNC/dook a *lot* more interesting than all the political bullshit."
I can relate in terms of Iowa/Iowa State or Army/Navy, I suppose.
By the way, Duke has trademarked DUKE and you can't use that word on anything unless you get their approval and pay them. Thus, DOOK on the tshirts. Plus, it's more appropriate, huh?
Matt, with all the love in my heart, I'm sincerely doubting that you can relate, even with those comparisons, not that I'm anti military or anti-corn, certainly. Re: THE game, I tried to fire up this pansy-ass chat-group on Friday night when Ian was probing their collective soul and retrospecting his former EE-on, um, er decade or er so on BlueVery Hill, but alas, nobody was listening. It's one game atta time tho' and this week is a new one, so we're hot and Puke's Snot, so Go Heels and my Grandaddy Matt was a classy southern Dukie, not some HickoryDickoryDockery-mother-sucker-puncher-B'Ass-Crockery royal pain in the arse blue screw. +
As for the sad and unfortunate turn of events in the Union Pit, IT IS lucky that nobody was hurt more seriously, but that hardly minimizes the severity of the actions and harkens back for too many Heels to Wendell Williamson's havoc, another purposeless, reckless act. As the junk yard man in "Stand By Me" said about Corey Feldman's character's DAd, "Loony, loony, loony"!