3/28/07
So, our band is trying to come up with a name. We have a show in about three weeks, and lots of ideas have been thrown out, many of which sound great for about fifteen seconds, and then are met with the postmodern monosyllabic "meh." It's getting tiring, because none of them truly hit the ball out of the park, and I'm as much to blame as anybody. I always used to get some freshman city desk editor to write the headline for my newspaper columns because I hated doing it so much, and this requires the same skill set.
Here's the big problem: words are so evocative that almost any seemingly-innocuous name can alarm the hairs on the back of your neck. On Tuesday, after overhearing a lady describing her two Jack Russell terriers at a magazine rack, I thought "Broken Coat" would be a great band name. One day later, however, I realized it sounded like a lonely emo high school group.
And so we look to our childhood for names that made us feel good when we were six, but they're all copyrighted, and besides, pretty much every geological layer of our nostalgia has been ruined by excessive digging. I blame the internet for ruining our memories. Talking about the minutiae of our pasts - "hey, do you remember..." - used to be so divine, but now, it's all on YouTube and there are entire websites devoted to shit like Spirographs and Spokey Dokes.
I beseeched my band to find a name from our youth "that hasn't been through the ironic meatgrinder," and for about five minutes, they wanted to name the band Ironic Meatgrinder.
I miss the unspoken, occasional memories that flash out from our childhood. I loved it when we would sit on the porch at the Purple House and talk about bands we loved and toys we played with. There was an "undiscovered country" about those memories, and it allowed us personal access and a shared history. Now all of that crap is plastered everywhere, about two clicks away from a Google search term.
I can't talk about my childhood anymore without being paralyzingly self-conscious. Nostalgia only works when it's tenuously out of reach. And it's hell on band names.
How about the Shrinky Dinks?
The part about "Ironic Meatgrinder" had me laughing my head off. I also loved "meh"--I had to say it aloud a few times because I'd never seen that monosyllable spelled out, and you hit it perfectly.
My favorite childhood toy was my Mrs. Beasley doll - the same one Buffy had on Family Affair. It's a little too girly for a band name though.
One of my favorite band names from a childhood memory was Veruca Salt.
From your childhood? How far back?
EZbake?
But alas, even that version with the copyright-avoiding initials has been co-opted a dozen times. ThinkGeek, for example has this.
Actually, I think some band names are too coy or pretentious or self-consciously iconoclastic. The good names are usually single words or text-message code-like. Nirvana, XTC, Yes, The Polce, (articles don't count) et al. The single-word names get the whole moniker thing out of the way and you can get straight to the music.
Good luck!
From Captain Kangaroo: Bunny Rabbit. It takes a certain sort of genius to look at a rabbit hand puppet, and name it something so redundantly obvious. Then if you watch the show, it becomes so much that character's name that you have to stop and think that it's not just a name, it's a description. And more than that it's redundantly over-specified.
OOppth -- there's already a Bunny Rabbit -- an all-girl hip hop outfit from Brooklyn!
How about Stretch Armstrong?
Broken Coat reminded me of what a co-worker (she was a flight attendant and so was I) once said to describe her messy hair, "I've got a busted wig." Never heard anyone else use the expression.
I think Busted Wig would be a great name for a band.
here's a hopefully not stupid question, what kind of music will the band be playing? Because as you noted words are powerful and yes "Broken Coat" does sound like an emo band.
Of course you could go for the "huh" factor and have something just out there. Maybe the "Cute and Fuzzy (or Fluffy) Bunnies" or "Berserker Penguins" or something 50's hokey retro/faux gospel "The Williams Brothers Band"
Personally I would probably go with something from the comics pages. Maybe "The Spaghetti Incident" (if that hasn't been taken) or "Weirdo's from another planet" from Calvin and Hobbes. I would suggest "The Icy Black Hand of Death Club" which was the original name of the G.R.O.S.S Club but it's already taken I believe.
How about the Citiots? I'm just waiting for you to mention that New York Mag article this week, written by one of your kinda neighbors. ;)
I agree with your Mom. Best band names are short and sweet and easy to remember and I like the text code ie U2, INXS. Given the probably demographic of your band - WeB40?
Wasn't the term "coastopia" created on this blog? Seems like a catchy band name to me, but then I have no creative flair when it comes to such things.
I totally agree with Mom that single words (not counting articles) work best for band names. Just my opinion.
Based on your post, you've probably already considered this -- but what about the Jarts?
Think along the lines of "OK Go" -- great band name, IMO. (Also, great band, again IMO... they're smart and they rock. They are WAY more than a treadmill video, especially if you can see them in concert, live.) Can you conjure any simple phrases like that?
How about an Internet abbrevation or acronym? Like: YMMV. (maybe too hard to say) FWIW. (ditto) BRB (Be Right Back-- that phrase alone is kind of cool). FTF, or Face to Face. I dunno!
I actually like the name "Purple House." Maybe too evocative of Prince, though... heh heh.
I know: "Coastopia"! Instantly recognizable to many. :-)
I go through somewhat of the same process when I try to name my fantasy football team each year. For band names, I always try to think about what it will sound like when you are introduced on stage (i.e. - "Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome __________!!!") Here are my votes:
Death By Jart (building on Curtis)
Meh
Coastopia (I really like that suggestion!)
ENS5 (or however many people are in your band: "Ian's 5" - get it?)
Wednesday's Child
The Bounce (not sure why I like this)
Secondary Break (UNC basketball reference)
Zipper Shoe (remember Kangaroo shoes?)
Oo, what Curtis said: the Jarts.
Or: Daddo and the Jarts (very retro sounding)
This is much more fun than doing year-end budget projections for my actual job.
"The Lucy Bug" popped into my head for some reason...but maybe too specific to you and non-inclusive for the rest of the band? Also sounds kind of like a disease (aw, man, I got a case of The Lucy Bug...", but one that everyone would be lucky to catch.
OK, need coffee now. Ooo, new band name -- The Grande Drips.
If you want to draw a crowd, I think the name "Free Beer" should do the trick. Might lead to some frustrated fans, but it would be interesting....
One Egg Cake
I think "Old Sour" has a ring to it...
Nutcracker Sweet
i've been holding on to this name for a side project, but i'll give it to you if you want it:
The Minibeasts
"Quite literally, a ‘minibeast’ is simply a small animal. Spiders, snails, slugs, beetles, centipedes, worms, earwigs, caterpillars……these are just a few well-known examples of the thousands and thousands of types of ‘creepy-crawlies’ that exist all over the world. Officially, minibeasts are called invertebrates which are animals without a backbone, and these are the most numerous type of animal in the world"
Daddo and the Jarts gets a vote from me. . . and Coastopia!!
Ironic Meatgrinder sounds like a vegetarian group. . .
What kind of music DO you play?
Out of all of the suggestions, I like anything involving "Jart" and I also think Andy's "Secondary Break" is brilliant. Also, can we send the word "meh" back where it came from? It's almost as annoying as the poster child for modern defeatism "it is what it is." I searched for the derivation of "meh" one evening after seeing it on Ian's nephew Lucas' blog, and several sources traced its origin to none other than Lisa Simpson!
I don't think this will ever make it past this page, Ian, but how about "My Orange Huffy"?
Another long shot: "The ScrumplyumptiousSnuggleSofnessBearz"!
Truly, "Daddo and the Jarts" is pure genius.
See you in LESS than a week!!!
I like the dark direction that Andy took with my idea. Along the same lines: Killer Jarts.
sucked right in, DANG! ok, here goes:
lunchboxthe grown men
the gigolos (spelling?)
cheeky bastards
fun dip
boones farm
goonies
gremlins
1983
the underpants
smelly underpants
the underoos
batman vs. dracula
the wondertwins
land of the lost
candy for breakfast
beatopia
bowling for dollars
big brothers
suckfest
the devil's spawn
go fish
tv dinners
salisbury steak
cafeteria bullies
drama club
band number 3
california roll
the avocados
MANGO!
just add water
ramen kings
bloody fools
peanut butter sandwich
Ghost Chimp, MD
Those Meddling Kids
Three Mile Colostomy
Social_retard461
The Wanton Shriekers
Whatever
We The Feeble (WTF) - or any other name that gives you WTF as an acronym
Stupidity Kills
Mother's Little Helper
Lonesome Drone (I have no idea why that popped into my mind but I kinda like the images it conjures)
Brilliant
Flagrant Foul
Hoop & Harm
JanglePop
Too Loud
Jackie Manuel
Bozoette Mary
LFMD
Pete & Pete (you could get Iggy Pop & Michael Stipe to do cameos like on the show)
Schoolhouse RockAt 13 I created the name Xanthus based on the mythical sound - the band never quite formed around the name.
I was pleasantly surprised to discover it was a real name for a Greek river and last year was shocked to see a band with that name. That's a whole lotta monkeys typing.Speaking of which, how 'bout Ghost Chimp, M.D. (GCMD)?
Some names have been used that I like...
KMFDM (later changed to MDFMK - brilliant!)
Mother's Finest (their logo was MF in a supermanesque sheild)This IS much ore interesting than my regular job, too bad it doesn't pay and I'm not any good at it :)
I take too long to type... Piglet beat me to Ghost Chimp while I was brainstorming.
Grrrr ;)
Coach
In High Point, I was in a band called Ground Control. I always hated the name.
I wanted to name it "Bugspot Wallpaper" which was what my father called the hideous wallcovering in our kitchen.
Brian from the Spanish House
I'm back for more. Who needs a coffee break when we can name bands?--
Elements of Style
The Royal We (or: The Editorial We)
(the next 3 are all candy names; I'm in dire need of an afternoon snack...)Big Hunk Candy Bar
Blow Pops
Mr. Goodbar
(more food:) Hotdish (see Wiki)
And, one more time: Daddo and the Jarts (had to vote twice)
Can't resist throwing in some of my thoughts...
Traipsing Memories
Banana Fana Fo
rEGAL sHITSTORM
Happy Go Sucky
Fat Guy Horde
Pretty Sneaky Sis
Gumbutt
Rowena Fuller's Back Waxer
Selected Hilarity (nah - over used)
========
If you use any of these I want free tickes to a show. ;)
Astronaut Love Triangle
I was in a band in H.S. that I named Rubber Husbands and I'm still pretty proud of naming (and still retain the rights to). For the record, a 'rubber husband' is one of those rubber discs that one uses to open stubborn jars.
Of the more recent names I've contemplated:
You Got It!
Visqueen
Fogboy (a band I was in was named this for a week)
Dust Jacket (kinda close to broken coat tho)
Galley Slaves
Smorgasbord
Blumpie (has sexual connotations)I want a thank-you credit on your first recording and guest list privileges when you come to Chicago if you use any of mine. ;)
I'm with Grumphries. I think "The Old Sours" though.
Haha.
Crook's was awesome, by the way.
Thanks again
Another name to think of:
The Old Wells
I don't know how many of the other people in your band have UNC connections but I've also always thought the Dean Smiths would be a good band name. Or the Dead Kryzewskis or however you spell it.
There is a band that plays in Columbus, Ohio every Friday night before the Ohio State-Michigan game called the Dead Schembechlers and they all dress like Woody Hayes. I find it hilarious.
But I know it's sorta uncool for some "serious" band people to make those kind of references, I've always enjoyed it.
Of course, I'm the guy who wrote a song called "Jordan is the Boy"
back when Magic and Bird kept getting the NBA MVP award instead of him.
oh, wait, i've got it... MOTHRA!
Jesus Christ, you people are good. I didn't even ask for band names, and now I have a ton to take to the guys (and girl). Two of you came up with names of bands I've already been in:
Williams Bros. (me and Sean)
Purple House (me, Matt McM and Noj)Keep 'em coming if you have them!
Daddo and the Jarts is pure brilliance. Anything with Jarts, actually.
Purple House was my first kneejerk thought, but all things Jarts trump anything else.
PS. I have been reading your blog for a few years after stumbling upon it while doing another search. I recognized you at the Fox commissary last spring and emailed you, remember? Turns out I worked with a friend of yours in the mobile fiasco... Ellen. Since then I think I have spotted you at Starbucks on Beverly a couple of times. Its like you are a type of "under the radar" famous. Weird, huh.
The Lurkers
La Maison Rose
GlobalCoolers
Equal Temperament
The Quartertones
3 Drams Later
Bach Spawn (BaxxxSpawn)
Multiple Stops
Invert This
Supertonic
Coastopia Quartet
B.F.D. - blogging for dollars, or big frickin deal
Any band name, search for it on myspace before getting serious about it.
"Stretch Armstrong" is/was a Utah Ska band. They, in fact, played at the bowling alley near Klea's house. I miss 870 E 700 N.
Given your rufous hirsuteness, a good South Park reference would be to call yourselves the Soulless Gingers.
As an Asian female, I'd suggest you make the name Chinese-friendly to open yourself up to the 1.5 billion prospects in China.
草莓園世界和平
Daddo's Pantapoons!
I also love xuxE's band number 3.
ok, you asked for it...!
more, more, moreanatomically correct
devil dogs
sleaze y sneakers
chuck y cheeze
love and lust
lampshade hats
piss and moan
cheap tacos
friend or foe
irresistable geek
pain killers
free drugs
ponzi
bass heads
rubber baby buggy bumpers
shag rug pirates
graffitti (spelling?)
yeah, right
gnip gnop
the what
the doomed
wankers from the great beyond
the dealbreakers
paris hilton (would do wonders for your itunes rank)
fluffernutter
mr. peanut
deep shit
steal this band
the afterparty
Holy Cow! I'm very flattered, Greg, but I like:
Coastopia
Daddo and the JartsAnd how about:
Lulubeans
I was going to be the 12th poster, but I used a banned word (the game of Texas and Hold 'Em), so my additions are late:
Here were my suggestions but I got blocked.
1. BUCKET OF BONES (both an homage to Billy AND a description of your band of old geezers getting together to rock and you can market the band with little dancing chicken bones like the Grateful Dead, or outlines of chicken drumsticks like the PEACE fish you see on the backs of cars.)
Following in Andy's footsteps with the basketball references:
2. BOX AND ONE
3. BLUE TEAM
4. 12th MAN
5. BEYOND THE ARC
6. DOUBLE DOWN (Both a basketball and Blackjack term)
7. DINGLEBERRY (self-explanatory)
8. MOOKIE BLAYLOCK (Pearl Jam's first name choice)
Daddo and the Jarts has my vote!
How about the Celextastics? Effexorama? SSRIs R Us?
Nah. . . . me neither.
single malt me
extant thread
the whitfield unit
cephalofunk
nartzeezee
chalkpack
foursquare english
fiveply anacrucis
yoam deam niros
yuppers
elf pensif
Since earlier today I had a Pottery Barn Kids stockboy ask me, "So did you ever think you'd get this great [Carolina] education and end up a homemaker?"...please let my poor SAHM-addled brain play, too.
Perusing a site of toys from the '70s...
Firetron Superball
Don't Spill the Beans
The Farbs
Fuzzy Wuzzy Soap
Giggle Stick
Growin' Up Skipper
The Honey Hill Bunch
Magic Growing Rocks
Major Matt Mason
The Micronauts
Patches McGee
Peachy And Her Puppets
Ready Ranger
Romper Stompers
Sea Monkeys
Shift Kickers
Skip-It
Slip 'n' Slide
Smash Up Derby
Space Hopper
The Weeble Wobbles
Wham-O Super Stuff
Schwinn Stingray
Grover
Amazing. All of you possess a gene that I do not.
I can't believe I'm posting 1 hour before heading to the airport with much still to pack, but I felt compelled to say: There was a Chapel Hill band called Grover! It was Angie Carlson's band. I think Andy Ware played bass for them...
Daddo and the Jarts! Daddo and the Jarts!
So Grover is taken, eh? Poo.
Going back to The Street:
Aloysius Snuffleupagus
Forgetful Jones
Guy Smiley
The Amazing Mumford
Same Sound Brown
Slimey the Worm
The TwiddleBugs
Journey to Ernie
Yip-YipsThat's it. Connor and I are starting our own band. We already have instruments and, uh, a very unique sound.
Great googily moogily - Guy Smiley and Forgetful Jones are both existing bands.
Slimey the Worm does not appear to be taken, however.
Name it after that kid who wrote his name in your barn, Henry Haywood or whatever it was. Except, that will give you the "jethro tull" problem of everyone thinking your band is just a guy.
I'm late to the party, a couple more for the fire:
I remember an old National Geographic special which featured this strange mountain goat that didn't possess the fight or flight reaction, the show mostly consisted of scientists sneaking up on them and saying 'boo' - the goats would freeze and fall over - hilarious.
anyways, I always liked 'Fight or Flight Reaction' as a band name.
howzabout Wisdom Sooth
or in honor of the Veldt, you could be the fjords
or in honor of Ghumphries old band, Dillon Epee
The Inner Child Proof Caps
The recyclers?
Knowing almost nothing about the band or the music is all but crippling, but I like "The Jarts." For some reason "The Pantaloons" comes to mind.
The Sea Squirts
Mums the Word
The Dorks
Pun Unintended
The Apocryphals
Random Anathema
(riffing on "Broken Coat")
The Second Coats
The Supersizers
The Greenhouse Gases/Greenhouse Gas Emitters