July 01, 2007
harvest gold rotary dial wall unit
7/1/07
On Friday, the day the iPhone went on sale, I started getting lots of shit from my friends - voicemails, emails and comments along the lines of "How's your iPhone, FAG?" My buddy Spencer wrote me a txt msg calling me a "spendthrift bitch" and someone else answered my call saying "How's the line, fanboy?"
Which was funny, because I wasn't entirely sold on getting one. Sure, I was covetous, and I already told Tessa she was receiving one for her birthday, but I wasn't sure about myself. But then I got so much crap for "having an iPhone" I figured I should probably bloody well pull the trigger.
Now, let me make an aside: every time I talk about "stuff," meaning "things" or even "material goods," I get emails from high-n-mighty conservatives calling me a hypocrite, since I'm so goddamn preachy about the environment. I mean, whatever, point taken, but my little electronic peccadilloes are hardly on par with bigger habits such as cars and household energy. I guess what I'm saying is I'm happy to release some carbon into the air when I buy an iPod every three years (and oh yeah, eat me).
Anyway, another way I'm an asshole is that I don't really do queues anymore. I've always had an "in" that allowed me to forgo lines, which probably comes from my dad, who never stood in a line in his life. Being a symphony conductor, he (and we) were always ushered in the side door. He never made a billion dollars, but we lived well thanks to the small favors of a winking maitre d.
Not so with the iPhone. There were no shortcuts, no favors to be called in, no fakery. Deciding to face it head on, I chose the worst Cingular/AT&T store I knew: the one on Lincoln Boulevard in Venice, CA situated on a smelly, baked-concrete traffic jam with absolutely no parking and a constant parade of beach SUVs without mufflers speeding by, filled with surf jerks yelling homophobic taunts.
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I figured this was the best way to get an iPhone, but it turned out to be the worst. The people in line with me were cool (all 500 of them) but the Cingular dudes ran out of iPhones suspiciously early, leaving most of us still sitting on that urine-coated sidewalk. They said we could put our name down and get one within three weeks. I decided I didn't trust them for shit, and would just go home and order one online.
Oddly, though, the Apple website said most of their own stores still had iPhones. I didn't see how that was possible - the Apple Store at the 3rd Street Promenade had a line that looked like Chapel Hill's Grateful Dead onslaught of 1993. Suspect, I brought Tessa and Lulubeans to the Promenade on Saturday morning, and not only did the sleek, air-conditioned Apple store have iPhones, but a line of ONE PERSON. I was checked out by a comely Asian woman, and that was that.
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I believe all California stores have since sold out, but you can still get the 4GB version most everywhere else, which really points out the binary nature of modern America. You either sit for hours on the pavement, or you stroll in and get what you want; the digital nature has no gray area. There is no "earning" anything, there is simply having enough information and getting the free pass to "GO" and collecting $200. This modern age must be exasperating to those over 70. Except my mom.
So tonight I got another txt from Spencer, asking "no, seriously, did you get your iPhone? Is it totally bitchin?" Actually, I don't know, I've been too tired to turn it on.
great story! but am i somehow missing the connection to wanting/having an iphone and being gay??? or is being gay STILL the worst thing idiots can think of to call other people they (ignorantly, out of car windows) despise? Gosh, wouldn't "Republican" work much better? ; )
Now we're talking! What is with all the snideness and trash talk from your friends? Don't hate the player, hate the game!
Thanks for the obligatory photo of you with your iPhone. You are looking so skinny and young!
Please let us know what you think of the iPhone. You are my electronic Consumer Reporter -- I had never even heard of the shuffle until you posted about it. The shuffle has been my saving grace here in Cubicle World.
I am slow to get on with technology, but once I do make that leap, I can't stand being without it. My first iPod was my first anniversary present and was something like a 3rd or 4th generation 15 gig player. The birth of my son brought me my first 60 gig video iPod which a car vandal stole a few months ago. And, fearing even 12 hours without my beloved iPod, I replaced it by lunch with an 80-gig iPod.
All that silly background is to suggest that I didn't wait in line for an iPhone and don't covet one . . . yet. But I'll pay close attention to the ongoing progress reports of Ian and others to see if it's something I'm gonna HAVE to have down the road. Until then, you can still reach me on the Blackberry Pearl. Which, for the record, is the first piece of technology that I ever got where my wife and all of my friends ended up getting after seeing mine.
By the way, as to Killian's point above, having an iPhone does not make one gay.
[Shouting out of open car window] "But wearing that short-sleeve purple shirt like the one JEFF wears on The Wiggles show? Yeah, that's a little REPUBLICAN!"
Smile Killian, I'm just kidding.
>>>There is no "earning" anything
For some, no, one guesses there isn't. But if you wait in a long line for an iPhone, in what sense have you earned it? Do they still require you to pay?
killian has a good point.
on another note, i like the purple shirt.
what, are you friends with isaiah washington now?
if I were thinking of a dis (to totally use old-school hip-hop lingo), it would probably be something along the lines of yuppie or sheep. (not that I'm calling anyone that -- everyone's got a right to their toys. this is america and the future after all...)
oh, and for the record I'm totally getting an iPhone. just in 3-6 months/whenever they work out the kinks. that said, this version is going to be an antique worth lots and lots of money one day. make sure you save it and give to lucy/any siblings she may or may not have. not just for the money factor, but as part of our cultural heritage.
it's fun to think of the digital technology now in similar terms as technology from 50-100 years ago.
I believe that's called a 'vibrant pastel', Ian's shirt's hue that is. What would it's J.Crew color name be? Blogverse amonsgst ya'selves.
Cullen - I think they'd pick a flower name for that shirt - "lilac" or "hyacinth" - but maybe only if it were a woman's shirt. For men - probably a manly "eggplant".
On the iphone subject - I just bought an ipod nano today so I am at least one to two years behind on the hype. At this rate I may get a iphone by 2010!
I am really not so into the whole iPhone hype thing. But then I'm not susceptible to the slavish adoration of all things Apple. And I'm a cheapskate; i get a new phone when my contract comes up and they bribe me with a new phone, or when my existing phone breaks. And there are 4 things I want out of a cell phone:
1. Make calls
2. Receive calls
3. Remember phone numbers
4. Tell time.I'm sure that the iPhone is a seductively attractive piece of kit but
1. I have a cell phone that was 'free', and a 2Gb music player that cost me $50 total.
2. Apple's iTunes and DRM suck hard.And I'm typing this from my work computer, a Dual Xeon, quad core Mac. It's nice and all, but at the end of the day it's a box, just like any other personal computer. You get out of it what you put into it. It doesn't make me 'think different.' I think it's great that Apple has built a version of Unix that you don't have to be a genius nerd to run -- Linux only dreams of being this plug n play easy to use.
But Apple's whole business is selling expensive stuff to people who will pay more for sizzle. I'm a cheap bastard -- give me the steak at a competetive price.
I've been lusting after the iPhone since it was first announced, but I won't be getting one until they put it on a faster data network and add support for "push" email. After a little less than 1 year with a Treo I completely buy in to what the iPhone can and likely will be, but on AT&T's slow EDGE network it's not gonna be there anytime soon.
That being said, I still want one, just not quite yet...
Ian- that picture is hilarious.
Kent- I just got rid of my Treo 650 and went back to a plain old Nokia with really, really good reception. The Treo sucked. Best move I have made and I don't miss the email at all.
You can put me squarely in the 'don't care' camp. I have a perfectly good Motorola Razor and a band-new 80G iPod and I see no reason to 'marry' the two. I rarely find myself in need of getting on the net or receiveing e-mail when I'm not near a computer (rarely) and I'd hate to give up the 80G of music files I currently enjoy so I don't see the need and I am a 'gadget guy' normally. Plus when the device is invariably stolen or breaks, it's just that nuch more frustration/aggravation I don't need.
I bought one too and it rocks.
Ian, I'm patiently awaiting your review. Are you ready to give us your ifeedback yet?