xtcian

The only thing I ask is that we equally make fun of a young dim-witted dude of similar privilege and prettiness, as they are surely out there available.

I'm saddened to see the dumb blonde girl stereotype perpetuated, as there are people out there on the internets making the "female = stupid" hay over Caitlin's deer-in-the-headlights routine.

"Those of us who call North Carolina home would suggest it was only a matter of time before South Carolina gave us something like Caitlin Upton to put our borders in stark relief."

I thought Vanna White had already done that? HA!!

I tend to cut her some slack... a teenager with a microphone shoved in her face regardless of her training.. i wonder what I might have said in that same situation?
In the end, we will find out how she turns out from all of this... will she be embarrassed all the way to the bank?

let those who are without embarrassing stumbles cast the first stone...

sorry, i cant' help it. God help those of us who have ever been humiliated and can't have pity for those who are humiliated ad naseum world wide.

I'd like to think that this episode might make some people realize just how stupid this whole teen pageant (or any "pageant" for that matter) is.
I urge anyone who enjoys this (and I imagine this is mostly men) to contemplate whether they would really want their own daughter involved in something like this. Teenagers paraded around in a bathing suit for judges to critique. I can't believe anyone in the 21st century thinks this is a good idea! But, what do I know. I would've never believed anyone would want to watch skanky women fight over time with Bret Michaels or Flav-a-Flav either, so I'm out of touch for sure.

Come on now, there couldn't have been that much sand kicked in your collective faces growing up to where you've got to feel superior only by trashing this teenager. Hell, I might be able to blow away the competition in a high school debate class, but I only try to pick on people my own size.

Yeah, she failed miserably on this question. Big whoop. There ain't a man on this list who, if he were also a teen living in S.C., who wouldn't slap his own mama to get a chance to take this girl out on a date. She's hot. That's half the battle. Let her go to college to get the brains. You can coach dumb folks, you can't coach ugly.

But yeah, pageants are stupid and only serve to perpetuate this kind of vapid existence. If you want to champion brains and boost self esteem in young women, have a Miss Teen Quiz Bowl.

As long as there are bathing suit and evening gown competitions, then the "brain" stuff should only be weighted about 5%.

What Cathie said.

Oscar Wilde's last words, uttered from his deathbed: "Either those blinds go or I go."

it is kind of terrifying that in the youtube era we're all one 30 second clip away from worldwide humiliation. especially those of us who have made really bad music videos.

i'm with Cathie and LFMD, all the way.

Everything that has been said by Ian and the commenters is irrelevant and is largely just a load of ivory tower crap. When you get right down to it, there are 2 responses that every red-blooded male should have to the girl:

Is she 18?
Hell yeah, I'd do her!

Okay, you guys are very sweet and usually I would be empathetic too, but really, this woman put herself out there to be judged - and even to be judged on her intellect! This was not someone just minding her own business who was caught messing up.

Okay, while I was typing the Bub's boy above added his lovely opinion.
I don't believe her "do-ability" was not in question. If that is all this pageant stuff is about why don't we just strip away the niceness and call it the "who men most want to f***" contest? Isn't that all it is anyway?

Obviously I was feeling doubly negative in my post. Thus, the double negative above.
I'll stop and settle down first. Maybe I'll just parade around in a bikini for a while instead of try to put words together in a sentence..

Since when should one model morals after the quips of Oscar Wilde? Kid screws up. We all screw up. Oscar Wilde was a screw up, too. When your daughter (like mine) screws up in something she wants to do and we do not particularly like I expect we should be reminded of this poor kid screwing up and be comforted because everyone screws up. Even Oscar Wilde.

1)she's fkn hot any way you look at it. porn lips or not.

2)what does this have to do w/ george bush? absolutely nothing. you just can't resist any negative comparison no matter how far fetched.

3)what cathie said.

4)what dfb&t's said. twice.

She is obviously intellectually impaired, everyone knows you don't need a belt to hold up a bikini bottom....that's just plain silly.

Neva, you're hot AND smart. If you happen to have a camera handy when you do your bikini parade, can you send me a copy of any photos? Especially if they involve you "trying to find your way back from the bathroom." Smile.

"Bub's boy", Miss S.C. was born in 1989, so I'd recommend that you and the other red-blooded Americans wait at least until 12:01 AM, January 1, 2008 before you make your move. And, if you're going to invite her over to your place, I'd suggest you give her a map.

Have "porn lips" EVER been a turn off to anyone?

You're sweet Greg, but after two kids, bikinis don't really make it into my wardrobe any more.
I can't help but wish the world was a little bit different and looks didn't matter to such a huge degree. I have two girls who will have to fight this "ideal" and I know it's such a painful thing. I hate seeing it perpetuated by stupid contests.
These pageants try to add on a little intellectual stuff to act like that part is important but how important is it really? This girl actually placed in the top four!

give her a few years, she'll be the next mrs donald trump.

Ok, so what's with the attack on blondes from SC? I feel the need to defend my homestate (especially fellow "dumb" blondes). I didn't realize NC was so superior. It is after all the home state of Jesse Helms. Didn't Fantasia from American Idol make it all the way through public school in NC without learning to read? I love NC too and I'm a Carolina grad... just thought that comment was unnecessary.
Not that I'm defending pageants or girls that enter them, but I totally agree with what Cathie said....she's just a kid. Give her a break!

Neva: thanks for leaving your sense of humor at home this morning.

First, GFWD is historically the biggest poon-hound I have ever known. Any efforts by him to sound like anything less than a caveman are insincere.

Second, every time a female gets all up in arms about guys lusting after a hot, thin, sexy blonde in a bikini, I usually find fat rolls and armpit hair behind the criticism. Present company excepted (ahem). If you are not sure whether you are one of these ladies, answer a few of the following:

1. Ever hugged Davie Poplar?
2. Do you have to choose between an 8-blade and a 9-blade when undergoing your quarterly armpit shaving?

Ian, you've gotten everyone whipped up to a fevered pitch today!

Yeah, she gave a silly answer and all, but truth be told, I would trade in my Phi Beta Kappa key to walk around in Caitlin's body for a week. Just to see what kind of reality I'd have being tall, thin, blond, and drop dead gorgeous. Would I get speeding tickets? Probably not. Would the men at work be kinder to me? Uh, yeah. Could I get any guy I wanted? Probably (this is hypothetical, remember, I am a married mama!). Could I get a rich guy to spend loads of money on me? Yes. See what I mean? The possibilities for an "easy" life are endless when you are as attractive as Caitlin.

um.. except everyone in the world feels entitled to mock you/make crude remarks about what they could/want to do you/question your intelligence and/or your right to exist.

doesn't sound easy to me

Inarticulate 17-year-olds with stage fright deserve neither our indulgence nor our pity. Those of you who say otherwise are worthless and weak and certainly could never have read upon matriculation to first grade.

Okay Dean, I happen to think I have a sense of humor. Maybe you just weren't funny?
What I don't have is tolerance for dumbass remarks. It's your type that make all men seem like they only think with their nether regions.
I don't have any problem with you lusting after this teenager if done in private and without degrading remarks. What I do have a problem with is our society holding her up for judgment in a contest and crowning her as the "ideal" female based on nothing but how she looks.
By the way, I have a perfectly normal BMI, probably less fat rolls than you Bub boy, and nicely groomed armpit hair thank you very much.
Not everyone who cares about how women are treated looks a certain way despite your bigoted opinion.
Do you have a daughter? Would you want anyone talking about her that way?

Boy, did I miss a lot today?!?

How many times in life would I have loved the opportunity for a "do-over". Aside from recreating the "Hey George, the ocean called" comeback like Costanza did, us regular people aren't typically allowed do-overs. Fair?

Without getting too much in this heated debate - Dean - be careful what you suggest about Neva. Aside from being the smartest person I know, she did have to beat guys off with a stick in college. I hung around her in hopes of getting some of the leftovers - although it didn't usually work!

YAY NEVA.

well hotness is kind of in the eye of the beholder, i guess. i think she's hot in a kind of generic wal-mart kind of way, which is kind of what i would kind of expect to see in that weird plastic pageant world where the most perfectly symmetrical blonde wins.

there are plenty of other ways for a young girl to use her looks to get ahead without going through this preposterous dog and pony show.

she could just go right out and pound the pavement to pursue modeling, she could find some kind of sales or PR career that isn't very intellectually demanding but based more on relationships, looks, charisma, etc., she could pursue the "baywatch" school of acting, i mean, there are a million things she can do and choices she can make. i don't imagine anyone held a gun to her head, she's the one who enrolled in this farcical baton twirling/Q&A/bikini thing, and clearly she's not cut out for this aspect of the competition. i don't think it makes any sense to patronize her like a damsel in distress.

I just say, welcome to the real world Ms. 17 year old.

Bub's Boy, I don't know that making mixed tapes with paragraph-long dedications for the girls I pined for in college makes one a poon-hound, as you suggest. But, then again, I don't think I mind the exaggerated description of my wannabe "skillz" back in the day. After all, that's how legends [in their own mind] get made.

I did talk with the lovely Neva this afternoon and assured her you joking in your comments above. To be fair, I also tried to talk her into posting a photo of herself in a "tankini" or a really low cut "halter top" in lieu of the bikini picture request that she initially declined. But she demurred. Our loss.

I laughed out loud with your observation that the typical female "haters" of women like Caitlin might be more comfortable hugging the Davie Poplar. That's been my experience, too. But, Emma's right about Neva. She's a hottie with brains. Neva, did I ever make you a mixed tape?

No, no mixed tape Greg although there's still time. I might have to bookmark all these comments and read them every time I wake up to a new wrinkle or cellulite blob!
Thanks for boosting my ego guys and thanks also for getting my dander up. There's nothing like a little passionate back and forth to get one's blood flowing and start feeling alive again. I'm ready to go out there and save the world again, or at least, make dinner..

Sadly, Neva, I have all of the mixed tapes I ever made (and there were MANY from 1988 thru 2000, when I switched to CD's) filed and sorted in a word file (including the cheesy little "inscriptions"). I'll go through and figure out a "greatest hits" of the cheesiest ones and send it to you. Rest assured that Peter Gabriel's, IN YOUR EYES will be on there. Hell, I might even stand outside your window holding my iPod over my head while playing that song, the next time I see you. Do any of our mutual friends have a wedding coming up or something?

Gee Greg, you never made me a mix tape, and I thought we were tight back in the day. Oh, but I'm not hot, and I'm probably not as smart as Neva either. Damn. But I have had my armpit hairs lasered off, so my pits are always looking good! (See, I strive to be the plain but funny girl.)

Rebecca, I never had the chance. You found your hubby on the very same Senior Class Marshal trip where we bonded in Ruff's Chevy Blazer. I tried to woo you at the San Diego Zoo, too, last October, don't forget. I had big plans for you at the monkey pit!

Greg: Matt and I didn't date until after graduation. I was dating that Yankee, Dukie frat boy in the spring of our senior year. But I had to dump him after dook won the 92 champoinship, because I seriously couldn't stand him after that.

I just read through yesterday's comments and was cracking up all the way through. Go Neva, indeed! And go GFWD! Go Rebecca! You all started my morning with a laugh--and Neva, good on you for speaking your mind toward saving the world. =)

For no Diana do I play faun.
I can tell you that right now.
I snarl, I hiss: How can ignorance be compared to bliss?
I spark, I fizz for the lady who knows what time it is.
I cheer, I rave for the virtue I'm too late to save
The sadder-but-wiser girl for me.

No bright-eyed, blushing, breathless baby-doll baby
Not for me.
That kinda child ties knots no sailor ever knew.
I prefer to take a chance on a more adult romance.
No dewy young miss
Who keeps resisting all the time she keeps insisting!
No wide-eyed, wholesome innocent female.
No sir.
Why, she's the fisherman, I'm the fish you see?--PLOP!
I flinch, I shy, when the lass with the delicate air goes by
I smile, I grin, when the gal with a touch of sin walks in.
I hope, and I pray, for a Hester to win just one more "A"
The sadder-but-wiser girl's the girl for me.
The sadder-but-wiser girl for me.

hester prynne!!!

NEVA--you are a force of nature. Thank you!!!!!

With apologies for my dumbth, but...what is a Davie Poplar? An inside joke with Tarheels or a pop culture phenomenon that I (born in Mid-Atlantic U.S. in 1969) somehow managed to miss? Someone please do enlighten me and any other clueless wonders among Ian's audience.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Davie_Poplar

It's a very 'poplar' spot, er duh. Ohlde well, pardon my 'density', while we're on it, my son Sam loves Silent Sam, another campus landmark, but who was he?

And don't ask Miss SC to find him without a reliable quad map (and a tour guide). Brilliant!