February 5, 2013
i'm not kenneth, there is no frequency
2/5/13
Alert the media; tell them I will no longer be watching them. I know I've talked about taking sabbaticals from the news before, but yesterday in the car, it suddenly became very clear: I no longer have to listen or watch any "news" ever again. I mean, really, never.
And the relief was so pure, so weightlessly effervescent, that it was a little like being drunk.
Does this make me sound like one of those lefty braggarts who claim they "don't even own a television"? Perhaps, but this revelation allows me to watch more good TV than ever - in fact, it allows me to do more great everything ever.
No more CNN, no more MSNBC, no more local news, and yes, no more "All Things Considered" on the radio. I can't stand any of it anymore. "Why?" you may ask... in fact, it doesn't even matter if you asked or not. I'm going to tell you anyway.
1. It's a Contentment Killer. Studies of the amygdala - the part of our brain responsible for our emotions - show that much of the news brings on a semi-permanent state of chronic low-level PTSD. When my doctor told me to erase my bookmarks after 9/11, he unwittingly carved a path for me back to sanity. Essentially, everything we did after 9/11 was wrong for our collective amygdalae (watching constant repetition of the planes hitting the towers), and it has been the media's unicorn blood ever since.
2. People Are So Fucking Stupid. Obviously this relates to #1, but I just can't watch Republicans do things anymore. Their behavior is so sick and reprehensible that I wouldn't be able to explain it to a 2nd grade class without unwittingly introducing them to existential shock. And they're on the news all the time, inevitably sending me into a rage coma.
3. There Actually Isn't Any News. At least not past the first 3-4 minutes. The rest is spectacle, sadness, schadenfreude and cultural death-jacking. Sure, there are occasional Arab Springs and rare moments of living History™, but like porn films of the 1970s, you'd have to sit through hours of garbage just to get there.
4. It Is Inherently an Unnatural Act. With nuclear weaponry, our species evolved technologically before our tribal animal bullshit could catch up, putting us in constant danger. The same could be said for us watching horrors unfold in other parts of the world while we sit on the couch. There are just some things our brain-meat was never meant to see.
In our primate hearts, we are meant only to understand and protect our immediate environment - "act locally", if you will. But seeing so many unfathomably awful things happening 10,000 miles away, every day, every hour - we're just not meant for it. I believe it inherently drives our loneliness and sense of despondency, and even keeps us from acting locally.
To clarify, I will still read the paper, as it is a controlled substance and flush with the brilliance of folks like Ron Lieber and Jodi Kantor and Hilary Howard and Thanassis Cambanis.
But my soul is exhausted by deafening drum circle of broadcast news, and I'm done with it. These days you can stay well-informed just by incidental contact, whether it's something on Facebook or even just floating in vague ether. There's also "The Daily Show" to give you a curated meal of the goings-on with a sugar-dose of humor. And for those who think I might suffer from a lack of perspective or that I'm preparing myself for Vacant-Eyed Dumdumville, well, that's a calculated risk.
Besides, I sat through Carter, the Iran Hostage Crisis, Jonestown, 2 shuttle explosions, Chernobyl, gun massacres, fucking Ronald Reagan, 2001, and decades of conservative cruelty. Hell, I even sat through Watergate because my mom stuck us in front of the TV while we were at the Ramada Inn in Waterloo, Iowa. Don't worry about me; I've already forgotten more than most of you right-wing dipshits will ever know.
cloistered in hotel, Waterloo, IA, August 1974
Posted by Ian Williams at February 5, 2013 11:14 PM
You need to give up the Daily Show as well. "Sugar coating" something that you object to "with humor" -- well, who is being duped there? I quit it years ago. Not good for your soul, to mask outrage as a joke. Just let go of the outrage. Much better.
Since the start of the year I've given up these things as well. Well, for the most part. I sneak in Rachel Maddow sometimes. I do feel clueless about "the world" but honestly my twitter feed keeps me in the loop a teeny bit, depending on what my peers are chatting about there.
I really considered this type of shutdown the other day when NPR--*NPR*--reported that Hillary Clinton was wearing her glasses instead of her contacts to the Benghazi hearings, as if it were legit news. What the.
I am 100% with you on this. We called our 8 year old into the room to watch the local news with us because the lead tease was "did the Punxsutawney Phil see his shadow???? Coming up next". What followed was 15 minutes of murder, kidnapping, death by fire, assassination attempts and cialis ads. I am by no means a Puritan but that was absolutely ridiculous. It was a direct assault on my family's collective brain and the local news should be ashamed of themselves. If you turn on the Real Pregnant Teen Housewives of the Jersey Shore you can expect mental terrorism - this was a Groundhog Day trap.
I hear you Ian.... for the last few years, I stopped following breaking news reports because there was so much misinformation . I started waiting 3-5 days before I could would get involved. The problem is, by that time, the news cycle has moved onto the next shiney bright news item and we get little analysis on the past few days.
As to your item #2 above....it is bad here in NC right now.
Thanks for not swearing off print.
another reason not to watch the news - just reported that they are banishing your beloved iron from the monopoly game set
It's amazing -- you had the haircut in 1974 that Michelle Obama has now!
I never make New Year's resolutions, but I did this year. And I've kept it. No NPR, talk radio, or even the am comedy station on my radio when I'm in the car - only music. It's put me in a much better mood. Before yesterday I couldn't tell you the last time I heard The Safety Dance. We can dance if we want to… and I am!
I majored in "broadcast news" (yes, I'm dating myself) in college, and all it took was a couple of internships at local TV stations for me to realize how awful television news truly was. I watched every legitimate news story get chopped to 10 seconds or cut completely every time something violent happened. I've never watched it since - only the Chicago Tribune for me.
Yes, there have been times when I've placed an embargo on broadcast news and relied entirely on the newspaper, and it was a real boon to mental health, so I understand and agree with what you're doing.
I also agree with Kevin from NC that following breaking news is worse than a waste of time. I find that if I want to have a good understanding of some big-deal recent event, I have to wait at least 3 days--a week is better--until the conjecture, bloviating, and facts-that-aren't-facts fade down to a manageable level, and some actual information is available.
If anything important happens outside my local area, 25 people on my facebook feed will tell me about it, immediately.
I don't watch the news either. I am occasionally embarrassed by not knowing some things that are going on in the world and this drives my mother crazy. But I honestly feel like I spend my days listening to peoples' pain and secrets and I can handle that....but the news traumatizes me and makes me upset. I'd rather just live without it. At the end of the day, I need some peace.
Lara: A Chicago Tribune reader! Thankyou! (I work there.)
@Kaarin - yes, I've stayed faithful. Still think it offers a good mix of local and national and has some great reporting. I was a print reporter out in the burbs way back when and one of my colleagues was Jeff Coen. Not sure if you've ever worked with him, but if you know him, please say hello!
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